With this article, I am going to give you a step-by-step approach to talk to girls on Tinder and ultimately win them over.
Hello, my friends – it’s Frankie here. I am going to be a valuable friend regarding your life because I have the secret to win hot girls over and to spy on them. (Though maybe don’t say that part to anyone.)
But today, let’s focus on texting women on Tinder and nothing else.
Whether you are just meeting someone for the first time, or you have spent months pining for them, starting a conversation with an attractive woman has been a problem of men throughout the eons. Dating back to Cleopatra and Mark Anthony, Napoleon and Josephine, sparking that initial conversation has always been critical.
Modern advancements like cellphones and Tinder would have seemingly helped in this regard, but it is still as much of a challenge today as ever.
In truth, services like Tinder might have actually made the initial spark much harder to obtain. You can easily get matches on the app, but what do you say to win over a complete stranger.
This might be a struggle that many men can relate to, but with the right attitude and a little luck, anyone can become a great conversationalist.
Get Started – Do a Little Tinder Profile Digging
Before you get to actually speaking with girls from Tinder, understand what you are getting yourself into.
A few seconds to check her profile can give you a quick look at who she is. There is a great deal you can learn from taking this step, and it begins with checking out selfies and pictures posted to the site.
Lots of beach photos? You might be able to learn about her love of the ocean or her fascination with traveling. Lots of pet photos? You can expect that she is adamant to provide the best life for her dog or cat. Profile loaded with pictures of food? She might be a foodie. If you do all of this correctly, this technique can actually help to weed out crazy woman that can gravitate towards drama.
Then she’s probably a foodie. If done right, you can also use this technique to save yourself the trouble of interacting with absolute psychos that have a tendency to go nuts on you.
Detective work is going to be key here, because you have a small window of time to identify common threads between the two of you. You should start by noting hobbies, for example, or naming the kinds of pets you like.
If the profile is too vague to find what common threads exist, you can choose any of the photos and use it as a conversation starter.
This step is often overlooked and taken for granted, but it can break the ice with someone new on Tinder before you even interact with them.
I would also recommend taking a look at the article involving getting the girl of your dreams with WhatsApp to learn other valuable secrets women have.
Initial Steps – It’s Time to Send Your Message
Now that you have taken a few moments to better understand the woman that you are trying to talk to, it is time for you to send your first message.
That means more than just turning red and hastily writing out the word “Hi” you need to have a plan.
Truthfully, the bulk of received messages on Tinder go to women, so messages get buried in a sea of potential conversations – unless you make an effort to stand out and pique the curiosity of your match.
Choosing the right things to say is something that you should not rush into, as you almost need a black belt in women’s psychology to avoid saying something untoward or foolish when messaging a girl on Tinder.
To give you a little bit of help on Tinder conversation topics, you can look to the master of texting girls:
1. Compliment her, but not about her looks
Honestly, you should not ever start a conversation with complimenting someone’s appearance.
It is a little creepy, for starters, and she then knows that you are already enthralled by her. This leaves you at a disadvantage for progressing the conversation in a meaningful way, and you are just another in a long line of men messaging her on the app.
Since you have already swiped right, it is understood that you already like her looks. That fact is not lost on this girl. Reinforcing it just ends up making people look desperate.
Instead, you should focus on things she writes in her profile. Is it witty or funny? Does she seem nice?
2. Weave conversation with common threads
This is one of the most successful Tinder approaches.
Once you have observed her profile, you might notice that you share common interests, such as traveling, pet owning, or a fascination with bands and sports teams.
It is also important to note that you should never attempt to impress her by speaking about topics you know nothing about. It is a huge turn-off to a woman to watch you crash and burn.
3. What’s in a name?
An excellent place to start conversation with a woman is with her name.
Using her name shows that you have taken the time to check her profile before you have messaged her. This indicates, in a subconscious way, that you are not just solely interested in her looks.
This is something many women rarely get to experience spending time on Tinder.
By just adding your match’s name in with your first message creates a small emotional bond with this potential partner – likening it to knowing someone for years.
If the name is unique enough, it could warrant a clever person attempting to make a funny pun of it, though you should tread carefully. As amusing as this can become, your match will not enjoy a sense of getting made fun of if you word the pun incorrectly.
4. Memes are a great icebreaker
If you cannot think of something to say, and their profile is not going to offer any help in this regard, you might consider posting a funny GIF or meme. Statistics have shown that you are actually 30% more likely to get a response in this way.
Sounds crazy, right? But hey, that’s the world we live in. Of course, this is a strategy that best works on women who embrace these newer trends.
5. Try playing a game with her
So many people start Tinder conversations with boring and inane questions – but instead of that, how about a game? It’s fun for both of you and you have a better chance of a response.
To get you started, you can consider some “Would You Rather” questions, “Kiss, Kill, Marry” games, and similar approaches. The idea is a fast game that is over quickly so you do not drag out a long and awkward series of texts.
If you are unsure how well the recipient understands the game you want to play – you can instead go with unusual and thought-provoking questions.
Moving This Relationship Forward
Once you’ve built a rapport, it is time to ask them out if they are interested in this. It is typically a good rule of thumb for Tinder to ask her out within the first 24 hours.
You can expect this timeframe to vary based on several factors, but you should look at it like an expectancy to close the deal or get her actual number within 10-20 messages.
If she is genuinely interested, that 10-20 message mark should be where her interest is maximally piqued. Earlier seems desperate and too late she begins to lose interest.
I should invite you to check out the guide to ask for a girl’s phone number (via Chat) where you can learn about the guaranteed system to get it.
Now at this stage, you need to have a positive mindset. You did not get all this way to start second-guessing yourself when its crunch time. It is time to dig down deep for some added confidence.
She has already swiped right to find you. At some level, she already likes you. All you need now is to determine the right signal for the go ahead.
There are many cues that you can look for to know when she’s willing to say yes, and below we’ve listed a few.
1. She’s replying positively
If she thinks that you are funny, or responds in a very positive way to messages you’ve sent, this is a good sign. If she is contributing to the banter, or adds in jokes of her own – even better.
Take time to note how long she takes to write her messages, though. If you are doing all of the work in the conversation, you can soon find that it was better for you to move on to other prospects.
If she is only ever responding with “lol” or “haha”, this typically means the conversation is not funny enough or alluring enough to actually warrant a date.
2. She’s committed to getting to know you
If she is the one asking questions to get to know you – she is most definitely invested.
This is a quiz of sorts to determine if you are worth dating or not – so pay attention! Craft your replies with the same effort that started the conversation.
The last thing that you want is her thinking you are losing interest in her. Maintain your witty attitude, and with her positive responses, she is definitely ready for a date with you.
3. Use bait
If you have reached the 10-20 message range and you are not sure if she wants the date, you can try putting some bait out there. Make the conversation like normal, but plant an idea of meeting up covertly.
You need to word it in such a way that it doesn’t demand a response. If she replies to that positively, then set a date. If she ignores it, it is safer to assume she is not interested.
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There is still quite a lot to say on the topic of flirting with girls on Tinder, but that is a good stopping point for today. If you have questions or concerns, you can leave a comment below and I will be sure to get back with you.