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Asking a Girl Her Number – In Person or via Chat

Hey! It’s your pal Frankie here.

Today I would like to tell you an effective way to get the phone number of a girl you are interested in.

Asking a Girl Her Number

First, and most importantly, I can show you how to land this number talking face to face. Then, how you can get these digits in a messaging app as well.

Let’s get past all the chatter and get started.

Getting Her Number When You’re Face to Face

Getting Her Number When You’re Face to FaceFor men of all ages, getting a girl’s phone number can be a considerable challenge.

Even I have had this be a thing as well, I must admit 😁. All I cared about was saving her number in my contacts and blowing up her WhatsApp with messages.

What trips them up is asking them correctly to talk via WhatsApp.

You cannot seem all over the place or too “at random,” like:

“Who even knows what I should say here, I’ll just ask for her number instead.”

Using this approach, you have to trust in some good fortune, for her to be in a good mood, and other variables. It is all too unpredictable to be a sound strategy.

You might even get her number, but when you go to use it, you find:

  • Find out the number isn’t real (by the way you should always try out the number upon receiving it)
  • You get single-syllable answers until she eventually stops responding altogether.
    She sees messages and does not care to respond to them.
  • Think, how many times has this already happened? Hehe

You can avoid this situation, but you have to focus your attention on both the timing of the question and how you ask it.

There are ways that this works, but here is a guaranteed system.

It consists of 3 steps:

  1. Design a motivator.
  2. Get the number.
  3. Make interesting conversation.

Ask for the number in 3 steps

1. Design a Motivator

Designing a motivator begins with creating a plan for what you will do together ahead of time. This provides a motivating factor to give you the number.

It is important for three reasons:

FIRST: It does not make her feel ‘easy’

Let’s start by saying something like:

“Do you like the place X? I think it would be nice to go there and get a drink with you.”

You are creating a reason to meet that has nothing to do with sexual motives.

This way, even though it is obviously a date, you do not force that issue and she can look at it from a different point of view. She isn’t going out with a guy she just met 20 minutes ago, she is going out for a drink to see where the evening takes her.

SECOND: It Prevents Embarrassment and Tension

You do not build up the event into the tension and potential disaster that dates can become this way. Rather, you are just casually saying “let’s both go to this place and drink something” – that’s harmless.

THIRD: Provides a Little Security

If you have only spoken with one another a short while, it is going to make a big difference knowing that you plan to do something in advance.

Remember she’s a woman, and therefore more in need of being leery of potentially dangerous situations.

By defining your plan, she has more security than just giving her number to a stranger saying “Let’s go out sometime.”

It is very important to create a motivator, and I would encourage you to make your choice very casual (meaning you should not jump right to dinner). Go to a public place, too.

You should start by knowing the place you intend to ask about, so you do not have to spend too much time mulling over that decision.

2. Get the Number

Once you have divulged your plan, you are going to have to follow up with “Leave me your number.”

Now, you can see that I never asked for the number, I told her she needed to give it to me for the plan to work out.

This cannot happen in some dictatorial tone, but instead like the most normal and casual question – like you are saying it to a trusted friend.

Steer clear of statements like “Could you give me a number?” or “If I could get your number, we could see one another.”

Remember: most women like men who can confidently take what they want.

When you are saying “give me your number” or “leave your number”, you are handing over your phone without waiting for her answer. (You need to assume she is going to give it to you.)

You should avoid having her say it out, especially in loud atmospheres.

You then need to say “I’m going to give you a call” and you phrase it so that she has your number and when you call – you are not an unknown caller on her screen.

Frakie dating tips

3. Make Interesting Conversation

Once you have the number, you cannot run away like you caught a live rabbit in a bag.

Keep the conversation going!

For a girl, it is never nice to see a man bolt once he gets her number. Stay and talk for a little while longer.

These steps are designed to minimize small problems that might arise. You are not obligated to follow all of them, but know that if you do, you have a greater chance of success. It would be a pity to make a mistake on a trivial thing like a phone number once you have done everything else right in your interactions with the woman.

Once you have followed this sequence a few times, you can do it without much thought – automatically.

But how is this possible?

What I have explained to you so far is a process known as natural seduction – and it is ways of behaving, talking and thinking that can appear spontaneous but become a natural habit.

Getting Her Number – When To Ask

How you ask for a girl’s number is equally important to when this question occurs.

Since I don’t want to leave anything to chance, I should go over the ideal time to ask for her number.

When should you ask? 👍

  1. If the conversation has gone on for more than 40 minutes.
  2. When you can tell that she is actively involved – i.e. laughing at your jokes, asking for information about you, teasing, etc.
  3. If you have reached an emotional peak in the conversation – i.e. she has opened up and talked about her life, you have offered up profound or important speeches.
  4. After inserting the designed plan in your talking, and she agrees – i.e. she is passionate like you are about American football and agrees that you two should catch a game together.

In other words – if she has completely warmed up to you.

When NOT to ask? 👎

  1. When this conversation has only lasted for five minutes (if she gave her number to everyone that started a conversation with her, she’d have 40 or more suitors a day)
  2. When you get the feeling that she is uninvolved or bored.
  3. When she shows no interest in learning about you. If you have asked what she does for a living, and she doesn’t offer the same question back after answering, she might not care.
  4. She speaks as little as she can, doesn’t keep track of where you are, and uses every opportunity to speak with other people instead.

Getting Her Number in a Chat

Getting Her Number in a Chat

Getting a girl’s number through a chat can be another animal to tame altogether.

Here’s a good bit of advice – remember that with a seductive environment, the easier and straightforward something is, the more competition you will have.

That is exactly the situation that you face with chats, because girls get targeted by literally hundreds of other men. These men do not have the courage to jump into the ‘in-person’ portion of this article.

No matter what social media outlet you are using, including Facebook, Instagram, Tinder, etc., you need a proven method or you are just going to keep striking out like everyone else.

There are some phrases I am going to share with you that can help you land her number in a chat setting.

Understand that this is all based on the premise that you have continued a conversation for hours, no matter what medium you are using – WhatsApp, Instagram, Facebook, Badoo, Lovoo, Tinder, and more.

Phrase 1

Ok, HER NAME, we have been here for hours, and I’ve learned anything and everything about your life haha…The time has come to follow my instincts and good feeling I get from you. Let’s continue on WhatsApp and I can close out of everything here. INSERT YOUR PHONE NUMBER – Write me! 😉

Phase 2 

Let me be honest and say that I rarely enjoy myself talking through a screen, but you are an exception. On top of that you have made me smile the whole time. I want to follow my gut here and give you my number INSERT NUMBER so we can continue wherever this goes on WhatsApp.

Phrase 3 

I have to go now so I can get (someplace i.e the gym, work, dinner), but I want to use my deductions about how well this is going and give you my PHONE NUMBER. I want to seize the day. If you feel the same, let’s talk later on WhatsApp and I will shut everything down here.

Phrase 4

Let me just say that by now I imagine you have figured out that I am acting on my feelings. I get flooded with messages and proposals from horny people here, so let’s ditch this and go to WhatsApp and keep this conversation going. INSERT PHONE NUMBER Write me! I’ll shut everything down here.

Phrase 5

Hey HER NAME, I am not really quick to do this because I am usually pretty apprehensive about it, but I can tell when a person is worth it. I would love to carry this conversation over to WhatsApp and close out everything on this site. If you feel the same, use this PHONE NUMBER, and shoot me a message.

To give you a little bit of help on chat conversation topics, you can look to the master of texting girls.

For more tips, check out these articles:

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About Frankie Caruso

I'm Frankie Caruso. I'm a professional amateur in that ugly business of social media, instant messaging apps and computer security. I help all those frustrated people who call themselves digital illiterates to understand something about this confusing digital world.

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